Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
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