Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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