Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
