i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Randomize
