she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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