Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
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