Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
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