You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
