lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
