Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
