I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
