I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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