Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
