you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Randomize