Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
my being single is dangerous.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
You're like the curious george of whores
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Randomize
