I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
there is glitter all over my balls
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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