i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
