For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
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