He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Randomize