Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
