i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
