There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Randomize
