True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
