dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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