Rock
Scissors
Fuck
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
