I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
