i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
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