I CAN MOONWALK!
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
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