found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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