Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
