what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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