So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Randomize
