Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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