Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Randomize