there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
