chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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