There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
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