i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
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