im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
