you guys were way drunker than both of me
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
