i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
