I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
She said her name was "party"
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
i think i have two assholes
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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