I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
