highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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