Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Randomize
