At least make sure they are 18
Why
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
