are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Randomize
