I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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