the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
