My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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